Friday, September 08, 2006

Bee Cemetery

Boy, howdy, did I get some creative answers to yesterday’s dilemmas. Tell you one thing. Next summer before the hubby and I started battling the wildlife around here, I’n gonna consult you BGs first.

My bee cemetery is growing quite nicely. Despite the missing corpse from yesterday, I must have a dozen bodies scattered under the lounge chair next to me. Feels mighty good to look down there and see the scattered dregs of bee-dom. One of the critters did a fly-by of the cemetery, took one look at all the bodies and got the heck outta there. I could practically hear him screaming about the evil-eyed murderess on his way out.


As for the deer, I got them good too. Now I don’t wanna hear anything from any of you about how mean I’m being to the deer. I love ’em, okay? But the love stops at sharing my flowers. They’ve got a whole forest to chew on, for cryin’ out loud. It’s not like they’re gonna starve. At dusk yesterday I heard the troops come out around the corner, as usual. Crashing their way amidst my plants. I went to investigate and caught the whole dang family chewing. Dad, mom and the twins. That did it.

Yesterday somebody said I should sprinkle garlic power on my plants. I didn’t have garlic powder, but I figured a good hit of cayenne pepper would do the trick. The plants got a liberal dose.

Didn’t take long. I was back on the deck, writing, and the deer thrashing started up again at the side of the house. Then I heard this strange noise. Sounded something like phhhtooey. A few more crashes. Then silence.

Ah, the thrill of victory.

Don’t mess with the redhead.


Bonnie S. Calhoun said...

LOL...That works until it rains...and then if any of your flowers are white...they will turn a wonderful shade of pink...been there/done that..LOL

Unknown said...

That is fantastic, Brandilyn! I love it. I can just see you running around your garden with a jumbo size container of cayenne pepper, gleefully smiling because you know your plan with work.

And work it did. Maybe you should get out the video camera. I'd love to hear a deer sneeze.

Kristy Dykes said...

"Then I heard this strange noise. Sounded something like phhhtooey."

K: Were they...sneezing?

B: "...the deer. I love ’em, okay? But the love stops at sharing my flowers."

K: Just be thankful they didn't eat your whole crop, like Flag ate the Baxters' in The Yearling. Ma made Jody replant the whole crop by himself, cause Pa was incapacitated. Then, lo and behold, Flag ate it again.

But I'm truly sorry about your flowers. Maybe cayenne pepper will do the trick.

Anonymous said...

Mule deer are whimps. A Michigan whitetail would have asked you to pass the tabasco sauce.

~michelle pendergrass said...

Now coax your neighbor into buying a salt block or mineral lick and you'll be good to go!

Southern-fried Fiction said...

ROFLOL!!! I can just see those critters scrambling for the lake, yellin' in deerese, "Water!!! I need water!!!"

Never ... repeat ... never mess with a redhead. >;o)

Julie Carobini said...

Um, two of my children are red-heads. Talking about thrashing about the (the rest of us know when to run, btw.)